Soul Soaked!

When we think vacations, we think relaxed times with nature. The noisy, hurry and run and shop is not our idea of unwinding. We love to get away to a place where even a shop of biscuits is not visible. However, the places we visit are completely self-sufficient in meeting our basic needs.

We are experiential people. We do not like to go on long winding abstract word trips. We rather love to get down to the grass root levels of a place and feel it. My kids too widen their base by expanding into a different reality- one that exists whether we acknowledge it or ignore it.

Our idea of holiday does not include looking for artificial entertainment elements, rather we find adventure in exploring "What Is" in its true form.

This October we had twin purposes- one, of shooting a short film and another of vacationing.

Our Destination was the rural set up of "Panose Kond" village in the Raigad Zilla. The closest Railway station is Mangaon. A Farmhouse Developed on 20+ acres of land by Mr. Jayant Naik, who is 84 currently. He bought this land when he was 60 and converted the barren untended landscape into a thriving ground of rice production; vegetables like Okra, Lemons, Chillies; fruits like Banana, Chickoo, Jackfruits, Pineapples, Mango, Mulberries, Cashews; Herbs galore like Turmeric, Tulsi, Lemon Grass and countless others. He has Teak and Eucalyptus.

He has deep support from his daughter Poornima Naik who is literally his partner in crime. He so fondly adds "Only my Poornima can stay here. She is so courageous." He is proud and he should be, for all the expert management she pulls out!

Together they are a Formidable Resourceful Duo.

Mr.Jayant Naik is an octogenarian Ajoba, whom my kids adored. His stories of childhood struggle of not having enough food to eat (loss of his mother at a young age) to today's abundance are awe inspiring. Each evening went in sitting around the dining table or living room listening to how he made this house, to his various adventures in other countries, to his statement on Government policies, creating impoverishment for his village folks. It had us nodding in agreement, as various aspects of rural life were totally lost on us as Urbanites.

What we take for granted like a mobile phone network is simply missing.

Medical facilities as basic as Anti-venom is simply not there. Snake bite is a veritable reality, yet the villagers devise an adjustment. They wear gumboots to deal with snake bites while they work in the golden-green, waist-tall grass. Nothing is wasted. The cut grass serves as fodder for Cattle.

Indoor Thrills

The Farmhouse is simple with basic amenities. It is a Homestay, so do carry your own towels, soap and personal toiletries. There is a Courtyard with cowdung flooring, keeping it cool and pleasant. Swing on the old wooden Jhulla or read on the cane swing or simply gaze at the greenery around. In the backyard are the glorious green plants offering you peace and silence.

For Children, they have a small pool tank which suffices as a swim pool. It is filled on a need basis with fresh water from the bore well and no Chlorine. Sometimes, a frog joins in but we are in nature; it has every right to. Fresh and clear!

Kids spent hours soaking in the cool waters. We joined them occasionally. We could literally close our eyes, be silent and actually listen to the Silence!

There is a Vermicompost shed where vermiculture thrives to add nourishment to the plants around. Another Daughter, Bhavna Jadhav is involved with that, and rearing of Buffaloes. She is greeted with evident fondness by the fivesome buffaloes as she brings them specially grown fodder from their farm.

We did carry few earthworms back to Mumbai, hoping their Green luck rubs on us too.

CUISINE

This was one of the best part of our stay. The amazing organic freshly made food by Poornima Naik and her staff. We got to eat authentic Konkani Curry, Sol Kadhi, Jhunka Bhaakar, along with other lovingly prepared dishes. Most of the vegetables we consumed and the rice were grown right there. They boast of not using any pesticides or chemical fertilizers. Their produce is fully organic. They live the adage "What grows in the backyard is wholly organic."

In the month of May, they promise a huge production of Mangoes and Cashews! We just might return!

Outdoors

We had to shoot in the Local school. The experience was humbling and educative. There are creative teachers making do with limited resources. There was just one, single room constituting the school. The teachers had painted the ground with boxes- teaching tens/units, numbers, alphabets, Kaana matras, boxes for word building, directions and shapes depicted.

The walls were painted with birds, flowers, vegetables, fruits with Marathi and English names. The floor paints allowed children to write on it with chalks and rub it out for the next batch to practice. What an ingenious idea- all practice on the floor and wipe it once done! Just one room, students from Grade 1-5 studied with two teachers at their disposal. The key to the school premises was is possession of a ten-year old who opened, checked carefully and locked once we were done!

Our visit to the local village too proved invaluable. We glimpsed their neatly kept homes, with shining pots and pans. Most importantly we witnessed their welcome even though we were strangers. We doubt if we would encourage any of them should they saunter into our surroundings. Absolutely never!

But they did spend a happy time allowing us to observe the process of rice threshing, even getting their kids to say a word we needed for our shoot. We learned how to win trust.

We had no biscuits, chocolates or any goodies since we came upon them accidentally. So, all we had was our own true selves to request, entreat and cajole to give a byte to the camera. The little ones shreiked in delight and camaraderie once they saw we came in peace and love. One Mr. Sadanand Mahadi promised to get his bullock cart for our shoot before sunset and he kept it.

Nozzer had this to say "When these innocent people give their word, they will keep it, no matter what!" We were thrilled to enjoy a Bullock cart ride by the Sunset.

We compensated in a pithy way, we Urbanites can with some money and goodies. To Mr. Naik, we can offer only gratitude for his magnanimous gesture of accompanying us to the village in the scorching hot sun and requesting the village folks to give us a Bullock Cart.

When a protest was made that it is hot and he must not venture out, he brushed it aside "I'm born and brought up in hot sun, nothing will happen." His humility as a Son of Soil is worth saluting.

When Shahaan told, "Look Everyone is waving to Uncle.", he interjected wisely "Everyone is waving because I am!" ; pointing out the vital communication principle to my little one that it is imperative, we extend warmth to receive the same.

The terrain was quaint, rugged, trails and trails of golden green grass on the sides with rural folk walking occasionally with a pot of water or a scythe, or bundle of wood. It gave us long uninterrupted periods of shooting wherever we wanted, how much ever we wanted. The serenity touched our souls with its queer solitude and secure bands. Though we were alone with not a person around not once did we feel scared. The people were non-intruding, went about their business without much ado. No one seemed to be in a hurry, nor wanting anything more than what they had.

If they were afraid that they would be bit by a snake, they wore gum boots.

They face food shortage, they grow subsistence stuff. When Shahen asked one, he simply shrugged "We grow rice, tur dal and our own vegetables, we eat that."

Water, they bring from a river that flows around the village, women folk washing clothes and bathing there.

They had Tata Docomo for network but it has stopped. Now they have no connectivity. They accept "Kaay Karnaar?"

Much of the adversity is accepted with such questions, where possible they improvise like gumboots and school premises.

We met hard working toiling people who impacted my kid enough to know what sweat goes in growing stuff, resulting in no wastage of food.

We met happy resourceful and helpful people who help without expecting much in return except a smile and a warm word. They feel happy to be useful.

We grew closer to Nature. The Silence, the serene solitude andthe content, no hurry environment. The willingness to wait for things to happen and resigned surrender to fate when cyclones flatten their plants or water shortage dries up their water bodies.

This terrain and people are fighters and survivors in no need of our sympathy but every demand that Gods and Government be kind to them.

Hope it happens some day that their water shortages and food shortages are alleviated.

As for us, we loved the long walks, warm smiles, naive innocent looks and golden green grass and the possibility to someday own a piece of land to claim this hushed solitude and striving and creating with nature!

By Sonnal Pardiwala

Drastic situations require Drastic measures!

(A  life incident of an Indian mommy who had to resort to drastic action when reasoning failed. Instead of judging right or wrong, I narrate her plight) 

Meena picked up the phone with a sigh, "Yes Mummyji! Arun will be there to pick you at the airport. No, please do not buy any crackers on the way. We do not burst them anymore." 

Her in-laws were expected after two years at her new house. Her mother-in-law had a distance control on lots of things they did in the house. Every festival was preceded with a call outlining what she had to do. Each event, 'skype-evidenced' to see if all instructions were followed to the hilt. It was more than a decade she was married to Arun but her mother in law maintained the "We do it this way, What would you know?" stance. According to her, Meena was from a lower caste and that was an irreparable flaw. She apparently had not forgiven her son for mixing his genes in an "impure" way. 

When Meena looked at her two kids, she saw only brilliance, simplicity and humility in them, but she knew her mother-in-law would never admit that. 

Her husband's transfer had allowed Meena to retain her sanity in face of laced prejudice of her in law's elderly folk. They kept moving city to city and sometimes even states. For her husband,  too, it helped as he did not have to take a stand for a nuclear family. 

"Have you brought in the ingredients I asked for making pickles? I will make them and go for my children to last you an entire year." her reverie was cut through by this sharp reminder on the other side. 

"Yes I have." was her dull admission.

 Meena was sure, she missed out quite some instructions in her distracted state. Two years she had lived with her in-laws and knew, no matter what she would do, somewhere a flaw will leap through. Her husband had not the courage to confront for he was raised to not do so. He found a diplomatic solution by accepting a Promotion that raised the salary but required constant transfers. The salary and perks were so good, it seemed practical for all. Arun did invest for his parents heavily. He was their only son. 

She did not interfere in that zone as their combined income met their needs and more. She was an environment conscious person. She inculcated simple tastes and needs for her family. This moving lifestyle did give her the autonomy she required. She was the Queen more or less. She could teach her kids what she wished. No one meddled in her household. Skype interactions can be handled. Family gatherings were during weddings and important occasions wherein they met under other people's roof and maintained civility. Few barbs may fly on her choice of clothes and stuff but nothing more.  

She sat looking around and counted all the issues her mother - in- law will extensively frown upon. She wondered ways to cope, avoid and skirt some. 

For starters, she did not have a full time servant! A top servant yes but no one who stayed around the whole day. Meena could not stand the situation where someone lurked around. She cooked their meals fresh and herself. She believed in Cooking with love thing. She had learned in her Spiritual workshops, she attended. For her, a family that worked together, learned to appreciate each other and also pitch in with each other. It helped learn the dignity of work!  Top servant came and went. No interference, no dependence. 

Her ma in law needed 24×7 needed an attendant. 

Stand off! For sure! 

She had grown a penchant for Gardening and Composting. She was lucky to set up her own Garden. She grew quite some herbs, vegetables and even was experimenting with cross planting.  She had compost bins out on the house terrace, where she held her Gardening workshops. Her newly sprouting beauties lay there. Any other folks, went "Wow",  over the teas sprinkled with aromatic herbs. Not her Mother- in- law. She would be furious to know about her expeditions with "Dirt". Peasants and servants did that. 

Well, she thought she could hardly hide the massive lifestyle she had created for her and her family. Her husband loved the Garden beaming with new discoveries, flowers, fruits. They had managed to find best sit - outs and Swings one sat on and sipped healthy brews. She was invited to give talks on Composting and Growing plants. Her children proudly hanged out with friends showing them around. 

Her ma - in- law will have a fit! She could do nothing about it.  She could not possibly shift her thriving Garden. She decided to be silent and let the criticism recede on its own. If she heard it silently her mummyji will slide to find another thing to pick on and prick. The "Bahu" is so full of them, there is always abundance in that area. 

Food was one area she had attained mastery. Her load will increase with so many preparations. No spice for father- in- law as he had Cardiac and lung  issues. Few vegetables were off for mummyji and as for her, they foursome ate whatever was there lovingly. 

Another big issue, loomed larger on her head was the "Cracker" zone literally and figuratively. She had discussed this with Arun five years back and had decided to not burst crackers anymore. She knew each one was responsible for environment and she must do her bit. Her kids were never introduced to crackers as part of Celebrations! 

Her mummyji had clucked clucked on it but being away could not do much. Her Daddyji like Arun took the "No Confrontation" attitude. Anything for peace! 

She was willing to endure low caste digs, bad householder remarks but this one thing she was not willing to compromise! 

She had no help from her husband who was meeting his parents after few years. He was unlikely to be pleased with any skirmishes at all. 

She sighed, hoped there would not be any. How she wished she could freeze or disappear these few days. She must get on though as best as she could. When Power struggle is on... It is on! 

The Door Bell rang. 

"Dada Dadi camnmnmee..! " chortled the kids who had gone down to play. They returned with their Grandparents and Arun in Tow. She touched their feet. She could already see her mummyji assessing her turf. She took a deep breath and went inside to fetch refreshments. 

" Daadaji not here, come and sit in the Garden. We just bought new swings. Mom will bring chamomile tea for you", Zesha pulled his Grandpa into the Garden. 

"Daadi for you there will be Allspice tea with no sugar but meethi tulsi", Younger Ishaan too imitated his elder sister. 

"Both of you, let them sit for a while and relax! " Arun interjected as he came back after putting the suitcases away. He had one small bag with him. 

" Yes Daadi has brought stuff for all of you", smiling their Grandma opened the bag. 

Next ten minutes went in Ooohhh! Ahhhh! as clothes for all four tumbled out. Crayons and Clay,toys and Games,  shaving device for Arun and casseroles for Her kitchenette. 

"Best is saved for the last. Here are crackers for you little ones. Deafen the entire building away" 

Suddenly there was an uncomfortable silence. The delight on kids'  face withered. They looked at their mom. Grandpa too sombered out. Arun distinctly shifted gaze to the sofa tapestry. Her mummyji looked at her directly and pointedly. Meena had to be diplomatic. 

"Easy " said a voice inside her! 

" Mummyji, We do not burst Crackers", Meena stated this simply. 

"Our children do not celebrate? " 

That was a Dig. She stole a glance at Arun who briefly gave an apologetic stare. 

" We all are hungry, let us just have lunch. Zesha, pack this carefully will you? " She got up with the tea cups and snacks that were left uneaten. 

Arun automatically picked up few plates and followed her in the kitchen. 

" She has made a servant out of my Arun", sailed in her mummyji's lament. Her Daddyji woefully whispered "Don't start  now please. We have just come to enjoy and relax not find faults" 

"Your problem is you cannot see what I see. My son should have chosen much better" 

Voices trailed away. 

Meena kept the cups in the sink. Automatically turned to the Flour kneading. She hated when both set of parents came. Arun's folks made her uncomfortable and Her folks made Arun feel despair. She remembered the same words her father had said six months back "Our daughter should have chosen better" 

She had kept silent then, today Arun did. They had stopped expecting each other to defend the other. Both knew how powerless they were in front of their own parents. Her father too maintained, she was far more educated than Arun and could have made a great Career. She may have been out of job market but she was employed well through her workshops and talks. Working from home according to her father was a Self Delusional activity. He too took digs at him and Arun let it pass. Initially they fought over no defense stance. Gradually they understood their weaknesses and accepted. Apologised at best. 

They were happiest when they were foursome and friends flitted in and out. 

Visit of either set of parents was a nightmare. 

Arun took the plates and lay them on the table. 

"So you learned this job too. Amazing Arun! " came another dig! 

She continued serving Chapattis while family ate. Arun veered the conversation to relatives and upcoming events. For a while, she was forgotten. 

Afternoon was a silent time as they slept. 

Evening the kids refused to listen and took their Grandparents in the garden. By the looks her Father- in- law seemed pleased by the Peaceful Environment. 

Arun and his Dad sat chatting. Her mummyji however seemed Grim. 

"Does all this muck not get in the house and make it dirty? You do not even have a person to clean continuously? " another question

" It is not muck Daadiji, it is Compost. We get rich healthy fruits, flowers and vegetables from it. See... " Zesha enthusiastically corrected! 

Meena smiled. Zesha had picked up her pride. 

" You can buy all that from the Organic market, why waste time and place growing? " came the deliberate feigned query. 

" Oh Daadi you know, only what grows in your backyard is 100% organic rest all is fake! " supplied Ishaan with a conspiratorial wink at his grandma. 

Grandma was cornered. 

" And how many shall you grow? " 

" One person at a time, Few veggies at a time!"  chorused the kids. 

Kids had keenly picked up her Workshops that happened right there. 

Meena was proud. Inadvertently her children were fighting her battle. Without knowing the Consequences. 

Grandma's temper was rising. She shifted gears. 

" So can I make pickles here in your garden. Is there enough light and heat? " 

" Sure Daadi but what you want to make Choonda or Murabba? " Ishaan asked. 

That got a furrow on her head. 

"What is the Difference Ishu? ", asked Daadaji. He was amazed at the kids. 

Zesha supplied" One is what you make in the sun's light,  another on the artificial gas! Mom you know which is which... " 

" Oh God no! " Meena wanted to not be part of this conversation. 

Thankfully Arun entered just at the time. 

" Dad, I have fixed your appointment tomorrow morning with the Cardiac Specialist. He wants few tests" 

That had a worried look crease mummyji's face. 

"Tests? Why?? " 

" Here,  Doctors test to be sure. Nothing to worry. Chill ma!", Arun assured. 

"Daddy, let us make Rangoli. I will remove flowers from the fridge" Zesha hurried away. 

Arun had discovered his artistic side and indulged kids in making patterns with flowers. They lit up Diyas and prayed. Even Grandpa made a pattern or two. Grandma, too, cannot be excused. The whole house looked divine. Arun was happy with his parents and kids enjoying together. 

"Won't these flowers cause garbage and add to garbage? " mummyji asked the kids. The loaded emphasis on" garbage" was purposeful. 

" No daadi, we will add them in compost. We give back to Earth what we take" Ishaan offered innocently. The sarcasm bit lost on the little one. 

"Come on kids, time for Crackers. Arun, you will show kids how to leave a rocket? Your dad was an expert! " Mummyji went in her room to bring a bagful. 

The Glow from kids' face again dimmed. They looked at Meena. She knew, she had to take a stand. 

" Mummyji, we don't do that anymore. I did request you not to buy them" 

"Now we have! " 

" I cannot help that but no We will not burst them".

"Arun,Can your wife explain why our childrem should be deprived of Fun? " 

Arun braced for a full blown catastrophe now. There was war of wills and he did not know where to stand. 

Meena took a deep breath" Mummyji, why should we equate fun with crackers. Were we not having fun just now, all of us? Is being together and enjoying each other's company not fun? Is only shouting, screaming hoarse fun? In a moment all crackers are gone in the air thickly polluted!  " 

" So what will happen if we burst crackers a few, others are doing it anyways! " 

" Our Supreme Court has taken Cognisance of this evil and banned its sale. We are making irreversible damage when we take in that black emission. We cannot reverse the damage" Meena answered exasperated. 

"All our lives we have burst them, nothing happened " 

" Mummyji, have you ever checked the accident cases during Diwali, the rise in Asthma, Bronchial issues? " 

"I will be supervising them, Arun and your father-in-law will be there! Do you doubt us? Will we not take care?  Just because there are accidents, will you stop travelling? " 

" Mummyji travelling is a necessity, Bursting Crackers  is a choice! " 

" What will my children do, while others burst Crackers, they will mourn in the house! Just like your side people do? " 

This was getting personal. Daddyji rose up and went in his room. He looked red faced. Her children were witness to this shameful struggle on an auspicious Day. 

" Just now they are actually losing fun by seeing us argue. Please let us drop this" Arun interjected gently behind her. 

Meena felt the pressure of giving in. It was so easy to just let her go with children and have her so called "Fun" She was a mother and she had values to teach and principles to adhere too. 

"She wants to control everyone with her activism. What will you alone do by not bursting crackers? Whole world is doing it! "

Meena ushered the kids in their room. Arun brought a glass of water for both. 

" You have upset even your father- in - law. We came from Delhi to enjoy in Mumbai so we can atleast burst crackers here but you had to thwart me! " 

Meena knew when Gears were changed

" Is it possible mummyji that dad's weak lungs could be the reason of Constant pollution your city and my city faces? We feel, what is one day crackers but they do leave a long lasting impact on each one's health and longevity? " 

" So now you are blaming me for everything.What about all the money I spent on them? What you know value of money? You saw money after you married my son! "

"Where will that money be? In smoke. Not only crackers but their leftovers cause more smoke while disposing!" 

"Don't burst them next time but this batch I will... Zesha, Ishu come... We will see, how your mother stops us. If you do not want us Arun, you should have send us back at the airport. I can leave just now...!"

Ultimatums!

"No mom, Dad's appointment is there, you cannot leave. His pressure has increased already! "  a visibly upset Arun returned from his dad's room. 

" Why will it not increase, some respect we got. Tell him to come in the fresh Air and enjoy with us. He will feel better" 

Her mom- in - law began collecting the Cracker's bag. She went in the kitchen. 

"Zesha! Where do you keep your Candles? Help me out here" 

Zesha and Ishaan looked perplexed. 

Meena stood there. She could give in to end it. She felt humiliated and hurt. There her children were standing looking at the Human drama unfolding. Either ways she was standing stripped in front of her children. 

Her stand of #SayNotoCrackers was for good reason. Her children and next generation needed it. 

No amount of reasoning will work, she knew. 

She took a decision in a split second. Confrontation was anyways on. It can get no worse. 

She picked up the Bag and went to the terrace. She had a drum full of water to tend to plants. She dumped all the crackers in them. Zesha and Ishaan followed mutely. 

Her mother- in- law stood transfixed with anger. Cold, white anger. 

"You left me no choice, Whether you burst them or put them in the water. The waste is similar. I will not have my children take even a slimmer chance of accident. No matter what adult supervision is there, they happen and hurt for a lifetime " 

She came to the living room and started the TV. 

The Lung Care Department 's Head was urging people" Is bursting crackers the only way to enjoy Diwali?  Let us pledge to create a better Longevity. By bursting Crackers, you just reduce your longevity" outlining the harmful effects Delhi suffered last year. 

Only if each one of us Understood! Not only this but every Diwali will be Happy and Healthy Diwali for all! 

Sonnal Pardiwala.

Karva Chauth - Gifts of Love.

I am 43 and from a Gujarati Household. From a young age we are introduced to the Art of Fasting. Fasting for a "Good Husband", Fasting for "Good Health", Fasting for getting a "Son", Fasting for Defeating Fate. 

As children, we were part conditioned to believe an unbreakable connection of fasting and dsired results. We feebly questioned it too,  but the women folk elder to us frowned so seriously that we dithered a bit but complied nonetheless. 

We grew up on a diet of Steady Fasting. 

Then I did the Unthinkable (for my parents)! Married a Man from a Parsee Community,  where "Fasting" was an Alien Concept. If anything, they ate at every juncture. Birth, Marriage, Navjote, Death. Food was an inevitable element in their lives. They rever Food. Alternatively, I also learned their Art of Praying to deal with inevitabilities of life. They prayed simply and expected Gods to bless without having to twist and turn in the tummy zone. Their restraint as far as to refrain from eating Non-vegetarian food on Tuesdays and Thursdays. It was a Huge Sacrifice for a Parsee person! 

No one expected me to Fast here. So Karva Chauth was a distant event in my life, happening in newspapers and Movies. Religion never came between the two of us. We enjoyed and Celebrated Everything. So did our two kids. They learned to recite prayers of both faiths and delicacies from both sides were devoured happily. 

The Childhood Conditioning is strong though. At a critical juncture of grave medical Condition of my Husband's brush with Death, it surfaced. It was "Sankashta Chaturthi". The fourth day post full moon is dedicated to Lord Ganesha and Moon. I began that fasting, on that day. After a long struggle with Death and a financial upheaval, we swam to steady shores. This Fasting now remained in my psyche. I follow it sincerely ever since. No elaborate rituals. It is a quiet day as usual, with fast broken after sighting the moon. 

This year, I jested that I dedicate the routine fast to you dear husband. It is the "Karva of Chauth". 

Left it at that. Of course my kids wanted to know what it was and why it was such a debatable issue. We gave our humorous as well as serious takes on the day. 

Since it was a Sunday, I decided to literally rest. Work was hectic so this day came in as a Boon on a Holiday. I requested my husband to fend for himself and the children. Three boys feasted on a nearby hotel delivery. I slept deeply the entire afternoon. 

When I did get up, it was to few pleasant surprises. A glass of Lassi waiting, an apple cut and a cup of tea followed. 

Still basking in the pampering, I was presented with a detailed dinner plan by husband dear. 

"I am making your favourite Rice and Aloo Sabji since you prefer homemade food at the breaking of a fast..." 

" Wow!" at not having to cook while I was wee bit tired and weak. 

My husband while eating confessed, 

" I thought, I will fast with you since it is Karva Chauth. I went in the kitchen in the morning to make tea and saw the biscuits. That's it. I could hold the hunger no more! I brought it out and ate it. So the next best thing I did was to "Cook for you, your favourite food!"  

Is love not about celebrating and caring for each other in this intimate way? Fasting is not a part of his psyche. Caring is! 

To cook for me, when I have not eaten the full day and keep things ready for me forms his highest offering. Offering love and care takes many forms in our lives. Instead of linking guilt and compulsion, if we allow each one to express care the best way he or she could, would this world not have love more and compunction less? 

What he could not express in staying hungry for me, he expressed in doing what best he could. Remember what I like to eat, cook that very thing with tender love and thoughts. 

This I believe was my best Chauth ever Karva or Otherwise! 

-Sonnal Pardiwala 

#JuniorFinanceWiz: Money in my Family

#JuniorFinanceWiz

Having dealt with lack of money in childhood and immediate years post-marriage, it was most important to hand over a balanced money perspective to both my Children aged 16 and 11.

It took a while to get the hang that money is not evil and it needs intelligent planning to keep it, and keep it growing. It was also essential to hand over a philosophy of Enjoying the Benefits money could bring your way in terms of goods and products one can buy and enjoy. The financial circumstances were a bit different at each child's arrival and growth period. They were a part of all our financial discussions and endeavours. They were a part of our Financial problem solving. A decade-and-half long exercise in building money consciousness was our monthly trip to supermarkets. The comparing of products in relation to their price, quality, utility, offers and discounts were happily arrived at together. It was impinged naturally why a certain product was not chosen. Reasons, as to some stuff already being there, avoiding wastage, a better offer or a deal. They learned that saving money did not entail deprivation but rather, the best value for money invested. As #Homeschooling parents kids were with us in work place witness to Hard work and Dedication we put in to earn our Wealth. They witnessed the Distribution of Monthly expenses and debates on why a certain service needed adding or deleting.

A working mother needs efficient gadgets which will allow work pressures to ease. So, time and again money was invested in the latest as the need arose. For Clothes and essential necessities, we discouraged "brand consciousness" which helped reduce excessive outgoings on a single product.

However, a utility as a smart phone was enlisted in for all four individuals as a lot of learning happened through Google aunty and Blogging, Youtubing happened on our electronic friends. So we are a mix of "No-Brands but happy gadgets",for they serve a purpose. Another important participation was when we went #Banking and #Saving. Initially, when we saved, we went in for Fixed Deposits in each member's name. All four of us know what is being saved, where and why. All of us know when each deposit shall mature and if we will reinvest, continue or Use it for a certain commitment. So, if one of us hesitates at the last minute while buying a certain thing we wanted, the kids will frown affectionately and say "We saved for it, we deserve it." It is our Mantra now.

Kids have their money fundamentals firmly in place and ask for only what they know can be accommodated. No sense of entitlement of "You have to" or "You do not spend on us" complaints. The Elder one, barely 16 already began earning through blogging, has steady gift vouchers for his and family's expenses.

The younger one too looks up to creating an Earnable skill to collect his valuable currency notes. Money is not something on which we argue as a family. We earn, we value, we invest together so we can say to each other "We saved for it, We deserve it!"

-Sonnal Pardiwala